Friday, August 01, 2008

Top Ten Fridays: Hopeface McRace Watch

Regular TPWK readers know by now that Hopeface is black. Actually, he is only 50% or so black, but in the course of a political campaign everything is exaggerated, so I'll give him the benefit of the doubt here.

Of course, Barack Obama is fond of reminding us that he is black. Recently, he suggested that ads comparing him to Paris Hilton were racist. Why? Because Paris Hilton is white. They should have compared him to Rihanna instead. That would've gone over swimmingly, I'm sure.

This is the tenth time that the Obama has played the race card. And so, I am announcing a new feature called the Hopeface McRace watch. Every time Barack Obama's campaign plays the race card, my blog will give him a present, and I will donate $1 to the NAACP.

Here you go, Sen. Obama. You've earned it.

To commemorate this new feature, Top Ten Fridays offers the Obama campaign ten ways to trump the race card in response to common arguments... Here we go.

10. Senator Obama lacks experience.

Response: What the McCain campaign is really saying is that black people lack the experience to do difficult jobs. Perhaps Sen. McCain would prefer if Obama stuck to picking cotton, as opposed to being "uppity" and insisting on his right to run for public office.

9. Senator Obama has flip-flopped on the war.

Response: Obviously, this is a reference to the fact that black men prefer tennis or running shoes. It isn't enough for John McCain to despise Obama for being black. He has to hate his black feet as well.

8. Senator Obama's domestic policy proposals represent a drastic expansion of the welfare state.

Response: Clearly, McCain is trying to paint Obama as the typical black welfare addict.

7. Senator Obama is the most liberal member of the Senate.

Response: Any casual observer can note the racial ardor of this charge. What the McCain camp is saying is that Obama is a black man who is not capable of thinking for himself, and that he is a bit too "uppity".

6. Obama's plan to expand the volunteer workforce raises troubling concerns with respect to the net economic impact of having the government act as a competitive employer to industry. The artificial labor force carries with it an intrinsic risk of creating dependency, as severing federal support for the program connotes a de facto downsizing scenario, which has the potential to result in rising unemployment. Irrespective of this scenario, the program raises consitutional questions with respect to the government's role in providing a civilian workforce. Even Franklin roosevelt met a constitutional challenge when implementing his new deal, and one could argue that Obama's plan would be dead on arrival.

Response: This is so racist, it doesn't even require an explanation. They might as well have called Obama "uppity".

5. Obama's race disqualifies him from public office and raises questions about his competence.

Response: This is racist, but not as racist as the other ones.

4. Michelle Obama's controversial statements seem to reflect mutually held assumptions that have yet to manifest in the campaign. Is Barack Obama sincere when he says he loves his country.

Reponse: Perhaps Michelle Obama should just stay home in the servants quarters, instead of being "uppity". The McCain campaign would certainly prefer it that way.

3. Barack Obama has an established record of refusing to take a stand on difficult questions.

Response: What the McCain campaign is insinuating is that Barack Obama, a black man, cannot think for himself. Obviously, they would like to portary Barack Obama as a simple negro.

2. Barack Obama is wrong on the issues.

Response: McCain is calling Barack Obama an "uppity" black.

1. Barack Obama is a distinguished public servant.

Response: The racism inherent in this statement is breathtaking. What John McCain is saying is that most black people are not distinguished. Calling a black man distinguished is the most racist thing you could possibly do, implying that Barack Obama is ambitious and "uppity".


Anonymous Anonymous said...

What's next, Obama in blackface?

6:40 PM  

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