Sunday, November 09, 2008

A New Beginning

Regular readers of this blog know that I am passionate about my faith. God has moved me in so many ways, and I am thankful for what he has done in my life. But, lately, God has felt small to me. Frankly, these past several weeks have caused me to re-evaluate my beliefs. But there is no denying the truth, and there is no turning back.

I have been saved by zero.



In truth, I should've have seen it coming. At the beginning of the football season, I pretty much thought Zero was just a big red ball that bounced behind the entirety of the Toyota product line. Like many of you, I struggled with self-doubt, and regret. But, after 4,747 subsequent viewings there it was, right in front of me.

All of my deepest, darkest questions were resolved by low-low financing on select new and pre-owned Toyota models.

Just today, I was moved to tears by the testimony of a friend, who has been saved by Zero during the Patriots-Jets game. He told me how he would wake up each morning, grab a bottle of wine, and drink in bed. Now he drinks in the comfort of his spacious new 2008 Toyota Tundra.

He still steals from his grandmother, but less-so these days. Zero is good, all the time.

Of course, this means I will be spending less time with my church, and more time with the three identical Camry's I purchased on Friday.

For those who have endured with me through this whole process, I cannot thank you enough. You complete me, the way other things used to complete me before Zero completed me. I would also like to thank the good people of Toyota for their wisdom in devoting GNP of Haiti to a massive media buy for a shoddily produced, creatively bankrupt horror of an advertisement. If it weren't for you, Zero would never have saved me, and I'd probably buy American.

Also, if anyone has a place where Khris can crash for a few nights... She hasn't been the same since I used her wedding ring as a down payment on a RAV4.

SAVED BY ZEROOOOO!!!!

SAVED BY ZEROOOOO!!!!


SAVED BY ZEROOOOO!!!!

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