Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Those Who Can't Do, Write. Those Who Can't Write, Write About Sports.

Rush Limbaugh tried to help buy the failing St. Louis Rams. Bryan Burwell doesn't like that one bit. Why? Rush Limbaugh is raaaaaaaacist. How racist? So racist, he has to make up quotes and attribute them to Rush, just to get at how racist Rush is.

This is drivel
. Let's shred it.

Rush Limbaugh wants to own the St. Louis Rams. Well, good for him. His money is green and plentiful and his politics are conservative, which means he'll pretty much fit right in with the rest of the gang within the NFL ownership's corridors of power.

Um, nice thesis statement, Bry.

They probably don't care about his politics.

Why would they? How could that possibly be relevant to the question of whether one should own a football team?

With a wink and a smile, they will surely welcome him to their club, because ultimately all they care about is whether or not his check will bounce, and we all know that's highly unlikely.

Football being a business, that is what matters, yes. When Bryan sells his house, is he more interested in whether the new owner can pay, or whether the new owner might be a Republican?

They will all look the other way when it comes to Limbaugh — forgetting his polarizing racial politics, conveniently ignoring (perhaps even quietly agreeing with) all the mean-spirited divisive bile that comes along with his ample financial clout — just like many of you surely will, too.

Largely because I don't give one whit who owns my football team, unless that person's last name is Ford.

They will look the other way because of his wealth and influence.

And because it is completely and utterly fine for a Republican to own a football team.

You will look the other way because to some of you, he is your politically incorrect hero, and the rest might be willing to ignore all of that just as long as he can put enough money on the table to help keep your football team in St. Louis.

And because his politics have absolutely NOTHING to do with running a football team.

I don't have that luxury.

Being a hack and all.

"Look, let me put it to you this way: The NFL all too often looks like a game between the Bloods and the Crips without any weapons. There, I said it."

And then Michael Vick, Plaxico Burress, and Donte Stallworth totally proved him wrong.

Those are Limbaugh's words. So are these:

"I mean, let's face it, we didn't have slavery in this country for over 100 years because it was a bad thing. Quite the opposite: Slavery built the South. I'm not saying we should bring it back. I'm just saying it had its merits. For one thing, the streets were safer after dark."

I know how those words play out in Idiot America. They are embraced as gospel.

Bryan is an idiot, and embraced this quote as gospel.

(ed. note:for those who are unaware, Bryan is now in hot water for having cited a left-wing screwball book, which, in turn, attributed the above quote to Limbaugh... Alas, Limbaugh never said this.)

But inside the locker rooms of the NFL, where the overwhelming majority of the players are descendants of slaves, Limbaugh's ignorant ramblings resonate with entirely different emotions.

That's because idiots like Bryan get paid to foment racial dissent with misinformation. The solution is to cease paying idiots like Bryan.

Remember the failed experiment with the ESPN NFL pregame show?

He said that Donovan McNabb was overrated on account of his being a black quarterback. It was then fomented by the race dissenters for weeks. It was also arguably true.

Remember the seething anger and pained expression on the face of ESPN analyst Tom Jackson

This I do not remember, since I could not possibly care less whether or not ESPN analyst Tom Jackson seethed or not.

Remember the uncomfortable backtracking that had to be done when Limbaugh spouted off on his predictable anti-affirmative action screed and took McNabb down into the cesspool with him?

Note to Bryan... Minority share owners in football teams are not called upon to provide football analysis on the air. Also, McNabb didn't go into any cesspool. He's still in the NFL. He's totally fine.

This isn't about conservative politics.

It's about deigning to express them in public.

He would fit right in with the rest of the exclusive boys club of ultra-wealthy, ultra-conservative white men who rule the ownership suites of most professional sports leagues.

So, does Bryan have a point, or was this article just an excuse to reproduce that phony slavery quote?

And yes, that is exactly what it is, no matter how many of his blindly loyal supporters want to put the "politically incorrect" party dress on it.

How about a "completely fabricated by a left-wing lunatic" tuxedo?

"The NAACP should have riot rehearsal. They should get a liquor store and practice robberies."

That's just really weird, moreso than racist. Seriously, the dude has been on the radio for, what, 10,000 hours? This is the best you can come up with?

If Goodell has issues with the embarrassing antics of some of his players, what will he do when Limbaugh inevitably crosses the line of good conduct?

If he thought electrocuting dogs, paying off the family of the man one ran over while drunk and high, and shooting one's self in the leg was embarrassing, just wait until Rush Limbaugh weirdly insinuates something about the NAACP.

Did you notice that I didn't say "if"?

Actually, you did say "if". It's the first word in the sentence above.

I didn't say "if" because anyone who is even marginally familiar with Limbaugh's act knows it's only a matter of time before he says something that is at the very least embarrassing but will most likely top out at downright hateful.

And if he doesn't, you'll just make it up.

Dancing with Limbaugh is like dancing with a snake. Eventually, the snake will bite you. That's his nature.

That's a very hacky analogy, Bryan.

You just might want to consider this while everyone is conveniently forgetting (or perhaps even quietly agreeing with) all the polarizing racial politics that comes along with Limbaugh:

Bryan has been doing this throughout the whole piece, the thing where he parenthetically asserts that the people of St. Louis are secretly racist. Have we reached the point where we can just parenthetically assert one's racism, by the by? Can we yadda, yadda racism? Apparently so.

In this modern age of the NFL, where free agents have the right to pick where they play, how many will turn their nose up at the Rams once they get a whiff of Limbaugh's "Bloods vs. Crips" sensibilities?

Not a single one. Here's what NFL players don't do: Turn down multi-million dollar contracts because they don't want to work for a Republican. This has never, ever happened, in any professional sport. Ever.

Here's a question for Bryan. How many potential owners (sports or otherwise) are going to want to invest in a town where the journalists run with false information?

Bryan may or may not know this, but St. Louis is generally regarded as a hellhole. Reason: it's a hellhole. The St. Louis Rams are worse than the Detroit Lions. Rush Limbaugh and his conservative buddies, racists (parenthetically or otherwise) that they are , are putting up a LOT of money in an attempt to keep a football team there.

The alternative is to move the team, in which case your talentless, hacky, unaccountable ass gets fired. Say what you will about Rush Limbaugh. At least the man can do his job.

That talentless thugs like Bryan Burwell won the battle here should give us pause. Apparently, there is now a political litmus test for investing in a community. We should think twice about that.

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