Sunday, October 10, 2010

Monday Musings

It's Monday. That used to mean musings, and will henceforth. Let's roll.

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Why is it that multi-platinum rap artists always complain about haters (aka hata'z)? These are the least hated people in the world, receiving popular and critical acclaim in spite of the fact that the vast majority of their output is incoherent vulgarity.

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Why does Superman II have a Metacritic rating of 99/100? That makes it the best film of the last 30 years.

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If there are so few compelling roles for women, why did the director of Youth in Revolt give such a meaty one to some girl named Portia Doubleday? Was she on a Disney show or something?

Otherwise, the movie is a pretty funny take on a book that was begging to be made into a movie.

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I caught Let Me In, the unnecessary remake of Let The Right One In, which regular readers have seen by now (right?).

The movie is quite good, as I assumed it would be. It takes a genre-transcending masterpiece and turns it into a very well executed genre flick, but when was the last time you saw a well-executed horror movie? Joyride? The Sixth Sense?

At any rate, Chloe Moretz deserves an Oscar nomination for either this film or Kick Ass. She will not receive one, to make room for someone from Secretariat and some veteran actor's brassy performance in an otherwise unwatchable film.

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Speaking of horror, vulgarity, and a lack of talent, I Spit in Your Grave has been remade. If it didn't offend my libertarian sensibilities, I'd call for the government to create a database of attendees. I think if you'd cross reference a list of guys who dress like Star Wars, guys who watch this movie, and guys who eat at Culvers, you'd have ten years worth of Dateline specials.

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Let's all thank the Minnesota Twins for their obligatory first-round ass whoopin'. If they were a college basketball team, they'd be E. Tennessee State.

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In college football news, Boise State drops in the polls after clobbering its opponents, in order to accommodate some Pac 10 team. Of course, polls don't matter because college football is a sport and not a race for prom queen.

Oh, right.

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Restaurants, you say? Here's the scoop.

Koyi has moved from Downtown to the Seward neighborhood. Among other things, they seem to have left the ambiance, as well as the ability to make reasonably priced, palatable sushi. My clam was dry and warm, and the house salad ($4) was two tablespoons of iceberg lettuce smothered in what tasted like Catalina dressing. At $13, hot sake isn't really even an option. What happened here?

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On the other hand, Mt. Fuji in Maple Grove was a pleasant surprise. Company at hand ordered that teppanyaki (the deal where they juggle spatulas and set your dinner on fire to entertain you), which is always a pre-fab experience, but the broiled squid was intriguing and generously portioned, and the salmon sushi dinner was a highlight.

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If you make it to Travail, do make it a point to try their blue cheese tater tots. They are more like potato croquettes, soft on the inside, laced with truffle oil. That they cost the same as that dreadful house salad should be a cue to high-tail it to Robbinsdale, if you haven't already.

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I'd go on, but all the hata'z (haterz? haytuz?) are getting up on me.



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